My Vacation From the "Shoulds"

I'm on vacation, and I'm having a wonderful time. It's a paradise. Beautiful room, white sand beach, gorgeous view. 

And yet, I find myself having a difficult time relaxing entirely. I'm relaxing, but not completely relaxed. I find that I am suffering from a case of the "Shoulds".

Here are a list of my "Shoulds":

- I really need to take advantage of my time here!

- I should make a drawing or painting everyday.

- I should keep posting and staying engaged on social media.

- I should NOT post, and disengage completely.

- I should go I to a deep state of contemplation so I can start developing concepts and imagery for my next body of work.

- I should start collecting words and images for my next body of work.

- I should do paintings of the coastline so I can include coastal scenes in my next body of work.

- Furthermore, I should barely eat anything, so I will still feel okay in my bathing suit.

- I should drink less/more.

- I should swim in the ocean. 

- I should go for a hike/sample authentic local cuisine/learn to paddleboard...

Get the idea? So much to ponder and worry about.

I heard a while back that the word "should" can be very toxic. It is a good exercise to replace it with the word "want" and see what happens.

Actually, I have done a number of my "Shoulds", because they seemed like fun at the time.

But what have I done mostly? 

Mostly, I have gone on a deep dive into some really nerdy books on archeology. 

Yes, archeology is my way to relax. 

- I have two magazine subscriptions (World Archeology and The American Institute of Archeology Magazine).

- I am a fan of Patrick Wyman's podcast, Tides of History

- I watch archeology themed shows on TV and YouTube incessantly. (My favorite, which is not exactly about archeology, is Mysteries of the Abandoned on Discovery) 

So I'm on a geek-fest, learning about how the Proto-Indo-European language, a theoretical language that became extinct around 2500 BCE, was the root from which most of the languages spoken in the world today evolved from. 

What can I say? It's what I want to do.

A bibliography of my vacation:

Three Stones Make a Wall, by Eric H. Cline

The Horse, the Wheel, and Language, by David W. Anthony

Tales of Valhalla, by Martin and Hannah Whittock 

Beowulf, translation by Seamus Heaney

The Dig, by John Preston